drunk baby 1 Meme Generator
Sunday morning. You can't stand up, you can't form words, someone has to help you drink water and you've lost a sock. You are 34. This is just being a baby with a bank account.
Eleven at night at the wedding. Uncle Steve is crying into the cake and falling asleep sitting up. The actual baby went to bed at seven and is the most sober member of the family.
At the office party, Linda from payroll says "I swear to you" and starts a story about the photocopier. It lasts forty minutes. It has no ending. She is very proud of it.
Night bus, two in the morning. The man opposite started a story with "so I says" twenty minutes ago and hasn't yet got to what he said. He nods off, wakes up, and carries on from exactly the same word.
Why it caught on: a bald baby in a navy cardigan sits at a pub table beside a full pint, with the heavy eyes of closing time. The pint isn't his. Imagining a toddler's day as a hangover isn't far off, and vice versa.
Best drunk baby 1 posts
- Officer,I'll glady touch my nose for you / As soon as my uncle gives it back
- Shit you not... / all i have to do is cry and she sticks her tit in my mouth.
- Last nighT is a blur / I vaguely remember sucking titties and shitting myselF
- I'm Just saying / Dora, I'd Explore her
- I shit you not / she said peekaboo, then disappeared!
- So i was staggering home and it hit me / when did i learn to walk?
- so i tells her im hungry / next thing i know she's stripping for me
- welcome / to scotland
- I met a cute chick at the sandbox / i was like,"You and i should go chill at my crib"
- so this guy is nowhere to be found / and as soon as he says peekaboo, i shit you not, he was there
- so then i says, i says / "this little piggy's of to the bar"
- I SHIT YOU NOT / THAT BITCH THOUGHT SPOONS SOUNDED LIKE AIRPLANES.
- I shit you not / I shit myself
- So then i says, / no. I got Your nose.
- this, this table right here / i love... this table
- So i was staggering home when it hit me. / When did i learn to walk?
- All i'm saying / Is i milked that hoe
- I shit you not / That airplane was heading straight for my mouth
- so she says to me, she says, "i think someone made a stinky" / I says, "where you been, dame? I took that shit hours ago"
- THATS NOT FAIR OFFICER / I CAN'T EVEN COUNT TO 5 WHEN I'M SOBER