WHat if i told you / the only way to prove science wrong is with science
A What If I Told You post.
What if I told you that you can leave a party without saying goodbye to all forty people. Your friend looks at you as if you've peeled back reality. Then she does it, and is home by eleven. A colleague watches you press Ctrl and Z in a spreadsheet and gasps: "it works in Excel?" You lean back slowly. It works everywhere. It is your one superpower. Your flatmate, at midnight, dead serious: "what if I told you pizza is just an open round sandwich". You put the slice down. You pick it back up. Nothing has changed and everything has. The man at the phone shop holds the power button for ten seconds and hands your phone back, working. The appointment cost £30. He has shown you the Matrix. **Why it caught on:** Laurence Fishburne's Morpheus, in mirrored sunglasses in The Matrix (1999), is about to tell Neo the world is a simulation. The fun is the gap between his gravity and the size of the news, and everyone has been told something obvious and felt the floor move anyway.